What I thought couldn’t happen to me actually did!

At around 1:00 p.m. on Friday, May 13, 2011, I left Benpres at Ortigas Center for the Eugenio Lopez Center (ELC), the venue of the Building Bridges Leadership Journey (BBLJ) Start-Up Workshop, with the BBLJ secretariat. Having been strapped for time, Laling and I agreed to buy the additional Workshop supplies at the SM Hypermart Masinag branch on the way to ELC.

Again to save on time, Laling and I agreed to each take care of the different items and then meet at a specific cash counter as I had the project’s cash advance.

At around 2:00 p.m., I was waiting for Laling at Cashier no. 7 with a big grocery cart full of assorted goodies for the Saturday evening socials and 60 bottles of mineral water for the field visit. Not to waste time, I wanted to have my wallet ready and groped through the various compartments of my bag for it. It was then that I discovered it missing.

Momentarily Laling came. I told her about my loss and proceeded to the Customer Service counter where I reported the incident to the staff in charge.

I called up my daughter and asked her to call up the banks to have my credit cards and ATM cards blocked. I then also called up my boss to inform her of the incident and to request that she bring some cash as Laling didn’t have enough money nor credit card that we could use for the supplies.

Soon the SM guards came. Following was what I remember relating to them:

A woman in a dress – big and tall and fat with a pockmarked face– was in front left of me as I was traversing the center aisle. She had the small grocery cart with two empty baskets. I was irritated because I couldn’t get ahead of her as she didn’t seem to know where she wanted to go. She would go left, then right then left again, etc.

In front right of me was a couple with a child. They too were not moving as fast as I wanted them to. Then from one of the side aisles ahead on the right suddenly came a slim, youngish girl. I recall telling her off to give way because her empty grocery cart blocked my path.

I also recall having felt that there seemed to be a number of people around my back. And strangely at some point these people were suddenly all gone.

I pinpointed to the SM staff and guards the aisle I came from and the point where there was crowding around me. I requested that they review their CCTV tapes.

I was just focused on getting the chore done so we could be off to ELC that I didn’t look back or around me. I now think that was around the time when my wallet was taken. But a friend said that may have been better. She knows me well enough to know that I would probably create a scene or fight it out in case I noticed someone groping inside my bag. And if a group was really responsible, I may have been hurt.

Much as I hope I could get my wallet back (brown, soft genuine leather with circles in different sizes in light-colored stitches, a small hidden tag of the Japanese designer in one of the card compartments inside the zippered section – it was a memorable, much-deliberated-on albeit excessive purchase on my last tour of duty in Tokyo), I thought that the possibility of recovering it or any of the things it contained quite remote. I had P20,000 project funds, approximately P5,000 personal money, various credit cards, ATM cards, ID cards, etc.

The incident happened during “off-hours” – there were very few shoppers at that time. There weren’t even any lines at the counters. The place had just been opened a week or so ago. It was one of the most public and guarded places. One would think it's an unlikely place and time for such an undertaking. Or perhaps this was precisely why it was the perfect place and time?

There may have been carelessness on my part. But it is clearly an indication of how widespread crime has become in our country and how criminal-minded Filipinos have become so brazen as to go about their business whenever and wherever they want and so cunning as to use their ability to think up of strategies to get away with other people’s money and property.

Material poverty is something we clearly see around us. But the poverty of the spirit that has swallowed many of us and prevents us from discerning and/or choosing right from wrong is what to me of greater concern.

In the aftermath, one is able to think beyond the “societal” to the more personal.

Thank God workshops are what they are and being in the Secretariat what it is – nitty-gritty details, last-minute changes, rapid-fire decisions, etc. Through Sunday evening, there simply wasn’t time for me to dwell on that big fat woman, etc. and her cohorts. (Judgmental? But it's circumstantial! What else can one conclude?)

In between the numerous chores though, images of my lost possessions would cross my mind’s eye causing a momentary lump in my throat – my wallet tattered and lying near a trash can somewhere. Or being summarily examined by an unknown person. Or perhaps being lovingly fondled by a young girl who could not tell genuine from faux leather but was just happy that she had a new wallet. My ATM and credit cards carefully examined and my personal details taken note of. My senior citizen's ID being turned this way and that, perhaps eliciting laughter from my unknown attackers at having victimized "lola" or causing guilt in some of them for precisely the same reason. The cash being counted and split across the members of the group. Or perhaps turned over to the group’s top honcho.

Once the workshop was over and I was back home, there was no avoiding having to confront the incident and how I really felt about it.

I actually felt I was attacked unwittingly. A stranger’s hand groping through my bag and through my things without my knowing still gives me a chill. I had other things inside my bag which means s/he even chose which one to take. At one point I even thought that it was a form of rape. A helpless, unknowing, unwilling victim overpowered by one so driven by one objective alone – to take.

Over these past days, I had time to process the incident a bit more and I continue to do so. I ask myself questions? How come I stopped my habit of just keeping a few bills inside my wallet and most of my money in my pocket (am not stating which pocket lest I be victimized again)? How come I decided to bring my credit cards and my ATM cards when I knew I would be cooped up at the venue through Sunday evening? How come I decided to take along P5000 of my personal money when I had P20000 cash for workshop-related disbursements?

Then I eventually told myself that the only question I should be asking myself now is: what is this incident telling me? And for whatever they’re worth to others, here are the more significant things I “heard” and “saw” in answer to that question.

 I must think through what I do or how I use each and every blessing I receive. That is the call of stewardship.

 My material possessions are proofs of my moments of great wisdom or careless folly. I must have more of the former and less of the latter. They are also made not-to-last and therefore losing them, whether naturally by erosion or decay, or forcibly through theft or others' greed, is a real possibility.

 Extravagance is a choice I make and often, unwittingly. I must make less and less of such and must therefore try to always have my wits about me, especially when at the mall.

 The future will flow into my life whether I like it to or not. Much as I wish I could sometimes postpone it or sometimes speed it up, I can’t. I must therefore live in the moment at all times, allowing the present to be and the future left to its own time.

 Everything that happens to me is potentially significant to me for a reason. But I must delve into each one in order to know, to understand, and to use appropriately, no matter how painful, unnerving or jarring.

 What happens to me could also be significant to others if they allow it to show them things that could be of use to them in their own lives. But first I must tell them about it, no matter how sad or humiliating or uncomfortable or time-consuming.

Over all, I am thankful that I was allowed to carry out my duties during the Workshop with relative effectiveness. I sincerely appreciate that Laling was there to help me through. I am also thankful that I didn't have any precious irreplaceable items in my wallet -- photos whose negatives or digital files I no longer have or my tiny metal glove souvenir of MJ; or something for my eyes only as that tiny slip of paper containing my list of PINs and passwords, etc. I am grateful for the couple of years that I had used that wallet before it was taken away from me. I give thanks for the opportunity to recover the money I lost and God's promise to provide all I need. I am glad that even the cards can be replaced though as I am finding out could be quite unnerving at times. I share my family's and friends' happiness that I was spared from possible physical harm -- we recognize God's protective hand throughout that ordeal. I am grateful for the generous and understanding soul who offered to cover my loss -- God will surely repay her abundantly for her offer.

Most of all, I thank God for the peace and equanimity at the height of "my tsunami," and a heart that has opted to see and learn rather than brood and mope after such a jarring experience.

Other learnings will be the subject of another piece including the funny, the absurd and the infuriating as I went about getting replacements for my lost cards.

Life goes on!